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Comments on 'A Girls’ Day Shopping (Part 1)'

Please note: These comments are the personal opinons of members, and do not represent any sort of official judgement, even if they are made by people in club management.  Everyone deserves respect for their creativity; but if you find a negative comment on one of your works, please don't take it personally.  On the other hand, genuine personal attacks are not tolerated and any comment containing them will be deleted as soon as we discover it!

Submitted ByComment
Rhiannon Rose
Entered: 2010-08-31 New!
I liked this story, especially the interactions between Layla and Dini's sister, but it strikes me as a little odd that everyone in the story accepts his genderbending so easily, especially in such a regimented society. I look forward to further adventures and stories while the story gets more in-depth!
Amelia Margetts
Entered: 2010-08-31 New!
Featured in LJ Community's Writing Spotlight 8-31-2010!
Kathleen Coburn
Entered: 2010-07-24 New!
Delightful!

I love the way the characters interact with each other. The salesgirl is someone I would like to see more of. I don't think she would make a primary character, but her attitude and knowledge might interplay well with some other characters.
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